Why a Lighter Approach to Life Can Be More Fulfilling

Do you often find yourself with a furrowed brow, feeling stressed, and taking life too seriously? Here some suggestions to help you approach life with a lighter heart.

Don’t take life too seriously. Punch it in the face when it needs a good hit. Laugh at it. — Colleen Hoover

Why so serious?

Ask yourself this crucial question: Why do you take life so seriously?

In the past, I took life much more seriously, driven by a combination of fear and perfectionism — a type of fear itself.

During my twenties, I often felt inadequate. There was a strong compulsion to prove my worth. My priorities centered on success, achieving objectives, and establishing my value to others.

That I deserved to be loved.

Fear is a common cause of taking life too seriously. This fear can be of losing control, not being loved, failing, or being alone.

Consider writing down your thoughts in a journal or a digital note. Reflecting on why you view life so seriously can help you identify and address your fears, making them easier to manage.

Cultivate Playfulness

Embrace the lighter side of life instead of taking things too seriously.

When you start to relax and be fearless, a sense of playfulness naturally emerges. This happens as you begin to worry less about others’ opinions. Playfulness is about respectfully disregarding concerns and embracing the joy in everyday moments.

Imagine occasionally sliding down a playground slide because it feels right or cracking jokes that bring smiles, including on your face.

This approach also involves seeing the bigger picture.

When you assess situations with a broader view, you recognize that many worries aren’t as significant as they seem.

Consider these thoughts:

• Is this issue worth sacrificing my current joy?
• Could I handle this situation with a gentle smile instead of irritation?
• How significant is this in the grand scheme of my life? Will it matter in a year?

Life is composed of a series of moments. Prevent minor irritations from overshadowing the beauty of now. Acknowledge them for what they are, revive your inner smile, and inject more lightness and playfulness into your life.

Understanding Unspoken Meanings

Often, the real importance of a conversation lies not in the words that are uttered but in the things that remain unsaid.

Take the example of a mother who often criticizes. It can make you feel wounded and annoyed. However, if you interpret beyond her specific words, you might grasp her true intentions:

• She loves you.
• She desires your happiness.
• She finds it difficult to no longer influence your decisions like before.
• She believes you’d find joy if you considered her advice.
• She seeks your respect.
• Her critiques stem from a place of love and a lack of alternative communication methods.

Things would be simpler if everyone directly said what they meant (like saying, “This is my life. I appreciate your input, but I will make my own choices. Please accept this. I love you too”). Nonetheless, mastering the art of interpreting underlying messages is crucial.

This skill applies in family dynamics and professional settings with bosses, coworkers, and social interactions with friends.

This understanding is crucial as it reveals that, typically, no harm is intended. Everyone acts based on their knowledge of what is correct and their worldview.

Since each person’s worldview is unique, their methods vary, though the intentions are often aligned. Consider this:

Why might someone who seems to mistreat me believe their actions are justified?

Often, it’s linked to their insecurities and fears. Each person uniquely navigates life’s challenges.

For example, a person who appears arrogant may be seeking affirmation. They might display superiority to mask their insecurities.

Imagine the exhaustion that entails.

Reacting with anger, frustration, or confrontation isn’t the best approach in many situations. More often, empathy is the key.

It’s a challenging route but immensely rewarding. It liberates you from much distress, regardless of others’ behaviors.

In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun and—snap!—the job’s a game! — Mary Poppins (P.L. Travers)

Enhance Your Flexibility in Thinking

Life is full of small choices with low stakes, yet these decisions can be a source of unnecessary tension.

Consider these everyday questions:

• What’s for dinner?
• Which seat should I choose?
• What time shall we head out?
• What color should this be?

If you often assert strong preferences, try adopting a more flexible approach. Realize that the outcomes of such minor decisions rarely have a lasting impact.

Becoming more adaptable can have a soothing effect not just on you but also on those around you. The less you cling to specific desires, the less likely others will oppose you stubbornly.

A laid-back attitude can simplify these daily decisions, making them more straightforward and less annoying.

“It doesn’t matter much to me — pick whatever you’re comfortable with.”

Practicing this flexibility makes life easier for you and contributes to a more relaxed and cooperative environment for everyone involved.

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” — Confucius

Identify and Minimize Stress Triggers

Stress induces physical and mental tightness, which is counterproductive to a relaxed way of living.

Consider whether you exhibit typical signs of stress:

• Do you often find your shoulders raised or your jaw tight?
• Are you prone to fidgeting, like leg shaking, or exhibiting nervous habits?
• Do you spend much time pondering over past events or future worries?
• Do you rush through meals or always seem to be in a hurry for no apparent reason?

Recognizing these behaviors can indicate elevated stress levels, which many people experience regularly.

Tension and exhaustion can make you take life more seriously than necessary. Try simple relaxation techniques like mindful breathing to ease tension. Focus on alleviating the primary sources of your stress and prioritize moments of calm. Stop tensing up—relax those shoulders. You’re not on the lookout for danger, so ease up.

Take a deep breath, relax, and smile a little — even if it initially feels forced.

Just like that, you’re ready to continue with a less stressful day.

Control your perfectionist tendencies

Perfectionism can often force you to take life too seriously because it stems from an ingrained fear of inadequacy. Believing that only perfection will earn you respect leads to a cycle of never feeling good enough.

The quest for perfection is a trap — it prevents growth, stifles self-acceptance, and blocks the path to contentment and joy.

Fearing failure means you’ll likely stress over every detail, but embracing imperfections is critical to personal and professional advancement.

Consider this: I open myself to feedback each time I release a new article. While I could aim for faultless work to avoid criticism, achieving perfection is unrealistic.

If I allowed my fear of criticism to deter me, I would never publish anything, resulting in stagnation and missed opportunities.

So, let go of the need for perfection. Accept that making mistakes is part of growth and moving forward. It’s a step towards a more fulfilling life, even if it feels uncomfortable.

Lighten Up: Seriousness Isn’t Always the Answer

While it’s true that some issues demand a serious approach, embracing a bit of light-heartedness can often be more beneficial.

Joy, lightness, and a playful spirit are crucial — they make life more enjoyable and can enhance effectiveness in many situations.

Not every scenario requires a sad face; a smile and a little fun can often brighten dark corners. You have the power to push back the shadows with your light.

Life’s burdens can feel heavy, but that doesn’t mean we should cease to find moments of laughter. Life moves forward, and it’s easier to navigate with happiness and light.

So reconsider how seriously you take things:

• It’s not always necessary.
• It can add lines to your face.
• It can increase your stress levels.
• It can make you and those around you tense.
• It can deprive you of experiencing life joyfully and freely — a pity, considering you only live once.

Why spend your days burdened by a frown and under-eye shadows?

Let yourself smile, engage in play, and dive into fun activities whenever possible. Ignore the naysayers.

In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun and—snap!—the job’s a game! — Mary Poppins (P.L. Travers)

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